Another Thought

So, while I've been stressing and freaking out, I've tried to calm myself by figuring out how I'd survive 'the worst' (for me that'd be huge debt and no degree). Before Henry started school, the thought of debt was overwhelming to me. Sometimes, I felt so scared of all that debt, I'd cry myself to sleep. But we felt this was the right choice, and we proceeded with pursuing Henry's goal of optometry. At some point we looked into the military option, to have them pay our debt. I liked the idea of a debt free education a lot. However, in the end, when we found out that there is the smallest chance of Henry being deployed, I told Henry that if he died on some deployment no money in the world was worth that and I'd rather have debt than not having him.

Now I realize, the same is still true. I'm not liking the thought of huge debt and no degree. If that happened it definitely would change a lot of hopes we have for life, like me being able to stay at home with our kids, visiting my family regularly etc. But, when I thought it over and thought about what mattered more: having Henry and Sophia with me, and being healthy but with a huge debt than not having them...Well, I realized all I ever wanted I still have, and being with Henry and our children would be more important than having to work hard the rest of our days and making sacrifices. At least we'd have each other. I'm grateful for that, too. I'm still opting for the degree route. But, in the end nothing matters more than having those we love with us. And I do. How lucky!