Getting Old

Well, it's been haunting me for a while, but now I really have to face the fact that I'm getting old. I'm turning 30 in about a month. Each time I tell someone my age, people react in a somewhat shocked manner. I guess, that's a good thing (most people think I'm 23 or 24). At the same time, I can't help feeling a bit weird, when I look at women my age. On Wednesday, at my book club, a lady was mentioning something about being the "old" one. She had 2 kids, pregnant with No. 3, had worked as a teacher, had been married for more than 5 years, etc. When I asked her how old she is, it turned out she was younger than me. Actually, I was the oldest one at the book club. Urghhhh...maybe, it wouldn't bother me so much, if it wasn't that I felt like I haven't achieved anything yet. I still, to this point, have never had a "real" job (as in a salaried position), no kids, no mentionable degrees, no awards, no marathon. In fact, I'm just getting fatter each day, and last night, I had a dream where I had to go to the bathroom real bad. I woke up, and realized I was well on my way to pee my pants. Sweet, not only am I falling apart, getting old and wrinkly, I'm also developing an early incontinence. So, do me a favor, and get me adult diapers for my birthday.